the internet can be a cruel, cruel world.

i recently (and by recently i mean 45 minutes ago) had a revelation. i can't really be proud of an idea i didn't come up with. it seems so simple and obvious, but it took a few copycats to really make me feel it.

it does not feel good when someone takes your idea and uses it as their own. at first, i took it as a form of flattery. after all, they do say imitation is the highest form. as an aspiring artist i've been trying to get my name out as much as possible, with online forums and blogs and things of that nature. i'm on the internet a lot; networking, browsing, getting inspiration and seeing if i've inspired others. one of my favorite parts about elsie's online class is seeing how everyone has a different spin on the projects we make. its been a very positive experience for me, and i've met some very kind, talented people. when i saw that someone from the class had copied one of my journaling ideas, it bothered me, but i brushed it off. i figured that it was a a form of complimenting my work, even though she never mentioned she got the idea, and handwriting, from me.

when i saw this today, it was the straw that broke the camel's back.
the image on the left is mine, a blurb i did for my myspace page about a year ago. the image on the right is from someone else's blog. this blatant rip off of my handwriting (as well as elsie's) made me feel really icky inside. it makes me very upset to see someone coping my handwriting and passing it off as their own.

i won't deny that i too have been guilty of using others ideas in my artwork, but it wasn't until now that i truly realized how wrong that can be, and how hurtful it sometimes is. i've been inspired time and time again by elsie, i love her style and think she's an amazingly talented artist, and in the past i have not given her proper credit. i've gone through my past artwork on my flickr and cited her appropriately.

i want to take a break from posting my art for a while. after elsie's class is over, i also am taking a creative break. i want to get away from the internet and give myself a chance to truly be inspired by life, and not by what other people are doing. if i've learned anything from this experience, and from elsie's class, it's that i don't want to be like anyone else anymore. i want to define myself as an artist, not by whose art inspires me. i want to make art for fun again. for my family and friends and myself. i want my ideas to come from me, not anyone else.

jizz in my pants

WARNING: mature content.
in the true spirit of finals, chelsea and i got together once again, put on our favorite song as of the past five days, and danced away. i apologize for offending anyone with this video, but our apartment has an extreme obsession with andy samberg.

its beginning to look a lot like christmas

so i stumbled upon miss hollysarah's blog and decided that maybe this year i might do a little wish list via my blog also. i always avoid the "what do you want for christmas" conversation, because i really don't like asking for things. but if you really really want to get me something for christmas, this would be a good place to look :]

i've been eyeing this for weeks. i want to start collecting vintage knick knacks to decorate my future home with.
also, i just got a cutesy new phone yesterday and really want to get a larger memory card for it. this way i can save all the sweet text messages the boy sends me :]

i found this today and immediately fell in love.
i really want a new jacket. something pea coat-like.

and of course you can't really go wrong with craft supplies. i always welcome more canvas, brushes and paints :]

and i'll keep wishing and hoping for one of these someday...
but of course, the only thing i really really want is to spend my christmas with my family and friends, i miss you all so so much and can't wait to come home for the holidays. i'm especially excited to be seeing this face more often :]
hope you have some wonderful and memorable holidays :]

in the deepest ocean

the bottom of the sea
your eyes
they turn me.

midterms are finally over! three more weeks until finals, then... FREEDOM. i need new classes pronto. this quarter has been a rough one. i'm looking ahead to brighter days.

i've been working on a set of three new paintings, i'm obsessed with this octopus right now!
as always, its Radiohead inspired. i've added lyrics to these since this picture was taken and they say "this ones optimistic" "this one went to market" "this one just came out of the swamp"

and this totally made my day. thank you so much beth for all your kind words :]

exciteddd

for so many things! mainly elsie's online class. i'm already starting my christmas gifts :]

i wanted to thank Leigh-Ann so so much for ordering this print from my etsy.
she's so sweet and super talented! i was definitely flattered by her request. it's crazy to think about how many people from all over the world look at this blog, let alone inquire about my art. thanks again for giving this one a good home :]

i started yet another journal, this time i'm going a different route. i have so many journals with so much written in them, it feels a little overwhelming sometimes, but i am very grateful to have them. while i still plan on journaling regularly in my usual, i have this cute little one to doodle in and write all my small, random thoughts that i really don't care to elaborate on :] this one is just for fun.
for more pictures, look here :]

and everyday when i come home i am greeted by this little girl:
i don't know what to do about her, we're all gone during the daytime and so she sleeps, and then at 4am she's wide awake! i wish i could trade spots with her sometimes.

here are some fun pictures i found from halloween.
my friend melissa decided to join us and be "old spice."

i changed my hair again! it makes me feel my youth.
we are so silly.

speaking of which, this is becoming one of my favorites. i love it when moments like these get captured :]

that is all for now :]

weeks of pent up creativity

i forgot how it feels

to be so incredibly busy that you don't have time to do anything else but work and study, let alone take five minutes to post a blog. i guess the real reason that i haven't posted is that i haven't created anything worth posting these past few weeks. i've been all work and no play.

it's my fourth week of fall quarter and it's already time to think about next quarter. i just finished my first round of midterms, about to start my first huge lab report on human reflexes (so excited) and for the first time in weeks i'm taking a night off to do whatever i want. and i want to paint.

like i said, these past few weeks i've been studying my brains out, learning about fluorescence microscopy, action potentials, simple harmonic motion of sound waves, and shocking little froggies into contracting their muscles. so i haven't had much time to create anything fun.

i can, however, share some photos and a link to an article i found on Jeremy Fish. his art is so inspiring, i've had the pleasure of going to one of his art shows and it's like nothing i've ever seen before. this makes me want to quit school and paint forever. but i really would miss the neurons and membranes.

happy birthday dylan!

today my little brother turns 17.

where does the time go?

how busy busy busy life has been lately.
its been a while, so lets catch up.

i've taken a little break from painting, mainly because i ran out of clean canvas, so i started a new scrapbook for daniel.
i plan on updating my etsy in the next week or two. i just added some fun hair pins that i've been complimented on so much [thank daniel for the idea] and i'm adding some new paintings soon!
the newest edition to our apartment is little miss tipsy. i moved her here this weekend and she's settling in very well. hopefully waking me up at 4am is just a cute phase she's going through. i'm so happy to have her around, i've missed her terribly since i've moved to davis.

school is starting soon. it seemed like just yesterday when summer was starting, and now it's coming to an end. professors are already e-mailing me with new assignments. this will be by far my hardest quarter, but i guess every new quarter starts out that way. i'll look back and think "wow, i had it so easy then." i'm excited for new classes and new friends and new routines. it's kind of like new years, except in september. i'm starting over in so many new ways.

switchblades

i submitted again to fecal face's free fridayz, go vote for me :]

so i entered a contest

but i didn't win.
ohhh well, i'm definitely doing it again.

it's a weekly contest hosted by fecal face dot com, a crazy cool website that supports the san francisco art scene, that i found out about through travis.

here's the painting i submitted, and the link to the blog it's on.
click here, and scroll down the the bottom :]

real recognize real

like counterfeits rejected,
come correct or kindly leave the table now,
fold your hand but your pockets not protected,
it takes one to know one
and two to double down.
Kid Gloves by Doomtree

ETSY!

i did it. i finally put up some of my paintings in my etsy shop! it's so exciting, go check it out :]

please don't wake me

no don't shake me
leave me where i am

I'm Only Sleeping by The Beatles

what a weekend. i've been so inspired lately. things have been so so wonderful since this one's been keeping me company.
we spent the entire weekend together. we worked on leaving eastland, my favorites are the robots.
and then sunday we went and saw The Dark Knight.
today i came home and started working on new paintings for sale in my etsy shop! here's a peek at some new items i'll be posting.

you are here.

new new new

so many new things.
my favorite new thing is Daniel Smith.
this boy makes me smile everyday.

and now we have a blog.
where we can post the beautiful art we make together.
and random other things along the way.

happy birthday mama!

i love youuu <3