Tuesday, January 26, 2010

take two.

ok, lets try that one again.

i don't know what it is about making new goals, but i always seem to find someway to distract myself and ultimately end up not following through. i really want to blog, as it turns out i have issues actually sitting down and doing it. i haven't even been following my usual favorites, i really need to get it in gear.

so i promised a catch-up post, i don't know how entertaining it will be, so i'll try to make it as exciting as possible. the truth is, i haven't been doing much in the creativity department. i just scrapped for the first time in months this past weekend. i've been writing a lot of poetry, which is part of that new hobby thing i wanted to try. maybe by the end of this post i'll grow enough courage to share one on here (i currently keep them on a super secret blog, call me a scaredy cat but after that scrap smack business i am keeping my personal thoughts and feelings to a minimum).

well, most of my time these days is spent working. i've really grown into my position as surgery scheduler. it takes a lot of organization, which thankfully i have, but also a lot of diligence. i've learned quickly that most things cannot be left to the last minute. i'm really being forced to work on my procrastinating ways here. every day is a new challenge; i'm learning a lot about the medical field, especially from the business aspect of it, which isn't always good. it's definitely changed the way i look at going to the doctor's office, not necessarily in a bad way, i'm just more appreciative of the work that goes unnoticed.

i work in our main office, and my doctor does his procedures at a separate surgery center. well, a few weeks ago i finally got to see one of his trademark specialties: a kyphoplasty. it was really cool, we got to scrub in at the OR and see exactly what he does during this procedure. without getting too graphic, he basically uses thick hollow needles to insert tiny balloons into the vertebrae and then fill them with cement.
this type of procedure would be done on someone with vertebral compression fractures, and the goal is to restore some height loss and ultimately relieve some of the pain those fractures can cause. it was a really cool experience and i'm so happy i had the opportunity.

well, one of my bestest friends in the whole wide world has left the country to go experience life in another world. little miss monica has been traveling through south america for the last month. she started in brazil, where she met a wonderful hippie man who spoke little english, and ended up staying with his family for two weeks helping them sell their handmade jewelry. oh, and in her downtime she went hiking, spent afternoons at the beach and sitting under waterfalls. now she is working on a farm in argentina. she really is the most amazingly interesting person. she'll be off to the peace corps in may, and spending those two years in fiji. i am insanely jealous, this woman is my hero.
this past weekend i finally mustered up the desire to scrap. truth be told, i haven't been using this awesome new camera and i am completely lacking in the picture department. so i decided to start a project that i have been dreaming of for years now. it's an album of my little brother and i. he's such a great kid, and i wanted to pay homage to our experience growing up together. it's a 7gypsies two-sided accordion album, one side is going to be of us as little ones, the other side will be more recent, adult-like times. i'm still working on finding pictures to put in it (there are so many!) so i will keep you posted on my progress.
i've been listening to this new album by dessa A LOT. like, more than any normal person should. it's her first full length (i think) and it is blowing my mind. this woman is so talented, she's performing in san francisco in february so maybe i'll be able to soak up some of her brilliance in the crowd.
i just got season 5 of the office, anddd i watched it in three days.
it's an obsession, really. and how many of you were so upset with the recap episode? i got so excited for a brand new episode because it's been foreverrr and they did the classic best-moments-in-the-show-all-wrapped-into-one-filler-episode. not that i don't love re-living jim and pam's road to marital bliss (i actually cried seeing the clips again) but still, i felt a little cheated. oh, and while google image searching, i found these funny office pictures that i had to share.

alright, i'm taking the plunge. over the past few months i've written thirty-sum odd poems. they're all extremely personal so please, if you don't have anything nice to say, keep it to yourself. i've always kept a journal to keep my head clear, and this has been a really great method to cope with my problems in a creative way. i'm really proud of what i've created, it's just a little bit scarier sharing it with the world (not that the whole world reads this blog, but you get it). anyway, i found one that i don't mind sharing. i won't explain it, it doesn't rhyme completely, there's no method to it, i just wrote it. it's called "moratorium."

moratorium

don't wait
clock hands advance while you hesitate
grab onto this fate before its too late
take into account
the stakes are getting high
pry those pupils from the plywood
eyes loosely bound to the ground we shook
look through the pages of her open book
find the hand that leads
through these crowded streets
of lost hearts and question marks
to a fresh start
x marks the spotted road
catch it before the cold
don't fold with a hand so bold
go all in, place your bets
don't let regret control your thought process
because you're not the only one waiting
sitting on the sidelines patiently
you tried to warn her
but she's been a benchwarmer
since she was old enough to play ball
since she learned how to crawl
through the debris of fallen stars
call her anything but far
she's closer than you think
whispering within an arm's reach
breaching the realm of sleep
patterns of yes and no
weaving on opposite streets
go a step further
flow with the blinking cursor
know the slow will nurture
the feelings of not letting go
the hope that still grows
stowed deep into her chest
muddled in that mess of a muscle
she held her breath.

alright well, hopefully you at least thought it was halfway decent. i'm going to call it a night, this one's begging for attention and i just can't say no :]

4 comments:

Carrie Rosalind said...

WOW! What a beautiful poem! I hope that you will share more with us soon.

Kari said...

proud proud proud of that post.
right on. love that you put yourself out there. more please.
xo
let's scrap more soon.

monica claire said...

oh my goodness you are tooo beautiful!!!! i am tearing up just thinking about you and oh so badly want you to be sitting here right now talking about your poem. and your life. and everything. love from all my heart, lets try and plan another gmail chat date soon!!!!

monica claire said...

oh my goodness girl!!!!! i am in buenos aires tearing up at just the though of you, and your poem, and your life, and our love and bllaaaah be here! lets plan a gmail chat date soon! love from all my heart!

ps i tried to comment before but it didn´t work, but if it did, and i´m just slow you can choose which one you want to delete. or keep the both, whichever you desire!